How Focussing on Yourself Can be the Most Selfless Act of Giving

Ask not what you could do for others, but what you should do for yourself!

Being a ‘better’ person isn’t just about performing ‘selfless acts’ and ‘serving’ the people around us. Sometimes, the most selfless act we can perform, is focussing inwards and enhancing our own levels of personal happiness.

Seeing and impacting the world around us in a bright and positive light, extends from our own sense of personal happiness. When we feel a strong sense of happiness from the inside, we naturally radiate and share that positive energy with others.

So how do we become happier and improve our own sense of wellbeing?

A good balance of positive emotion, genuine engagement, strong relationships, life purpose or meaning, as well as satisfying accomplishments, builds our sense of happiness and fulfilment. These elements help us to develop new cognitive (thinking) and emotional (feeling) tools and skills that effectively enable us to become better versions of ourselves.

When we are AT our best, we are far better equipped to GIVE our best!

Elements of Happiness:

 Positive Emotion: Being optimistic and viewing the past, present and future with a positive perspective increases our levels of enjoyment, commitment, creativity, resilience and health.

Genuine Engagement: Being physically, emotionally & intellectually ‘present’ allows us to become blissful immersed in a state of ‘flow’. When we are genuinely engaged, we are able to be our true authentic self.

Strong Relationships: As humans, we thrive on love, intimacy and strong emotional and physical connections with others. Positive relationships increase happiness levels and also provide support during difficult times.

Life Purpose & Meaning: Engaging in work or personal activities that are completely aligned with our core values is immensely fulfilling. When we are able to direct our personal strengths towards our ‘calling’, our sense of purpose and meaning is significantly increased.

Satisfying Accomplishments: Being quietly ambitious and achieving realistic goals through ‘well aligned’ effort, creates a sense of pride, satisfaction and accomplishment. This experience encourages us to further develop and grow our capabilities, ultimately allowing us to flourish.  

Consider Your Own Happiness:

A simple activity to evaluate our own level of happiness, is to rate each ‘element’ on a scale of 1 to 5. In a mindful, non-judgemental way, ask the following questions:

  1. Do I adopt a positive perspective as often as I can? Is my glass half full or half empty? Do I learn from my experiences and move on easily?
  2. Am I regularly engaged in work or activities that make me happy? Am I able to immerse myself in interesting and fulfilling pursuits?
  3. Do I have strong connections with others that allow me to give and receive physical and emotional love, intimacy or support?
  4. Are my daily activities and long term pursuits aligned to my core values? Do they bring me a greater sense of purpose in life. Have I found my ‘calling’?
  5. Do I strive to reach established goals which provide a sense of achievement? Do I savour these experiences and strive to achieve even further?

Prioritise and Focus:

Although there’s no ideal or ‘perfect’ score for evaluating happiness, consider how well balanced your experience of these elements is. Is there a particular element that may be lacking? For example, could you strengthen your relationships or aim for new goals? If so, consider prioritising and focusing some attention towards improving that elements.

If you already experience a good balance and score them all highly, you feel a strong sense of happiness. You naturally radiate positivity and attract and energise others around you.

When your happiness and positive energy is shared with the world, you contribute towards making it a happier and more positive place.

For this, and more great tips on being and living a better version of you, head to:

Thank you for your selfless act of giving!




NB: Use of the term ‘better’ person relates only to the individual, not as a comparison to others.


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